Dear Coach Paradise,
… I think I need a life coach or at any rate I need help from somewhere or something. I have owned and operated a small business for the past 15 years. It has been successful. Buying it was an act of daring and courage, as I had never seen myself in the role of entrepreneur or boss. I was scared and owe it to a friend and mentor who pushed me and believed in me. That seems like long ago and I have worked hard. My problem now is that it consumes all my time and I feel like I am on a treadmill: no time to breath, enjoy my children or explore other interests. I know it is time to move on or make some kind of big change but I am terrified. I am so afraid that I will just stay put because I don’t have what it takes to change and I am afraid to make a change. Catch-22?
Signed,
Running on Empty
Dear Running on Empty,
A life coach is exactly what you need and here’s why. A coach can do the same thing for you that your friend/mentor did 15 years ago, namely – see who you really are and what you are capable of, even if you can’t see it for yourself. A coach will hold the space for you to be your best, most authentic, most powerful self and once you have connected with that, the rest will be history. Remember that empty is a space waiting to be filled.
From your brief note I see that you are, in fact, a person of great courage and integrity. You took a big chance years ago and it has paid off. You are a hard worker and you are grateful to people who have helped you. You know how to be successful. These are life skills that exist within you regardless of how you feel about your current situation. You can mobilize and use these skills to create the next chapter of your life, with or without your business.
Rather than worrying about the "hows" of right now, I would suggest that you start freeing your imagination and thinking about how you would like your life to be. What ingredients are musts in the recipe of your life? It sounds like you want more time with your kids, an opportunity to explore forgotten (or remembered) passions, more space, a way to continue to pay the bills.
I would suggest that you write a vision statement of your life in 18 months (or 2 yrs or 5) and write it in the present tense (“I am now enjoying having lots of time to spend with my kids and am relaxed in all that I do etc. …) Make it up as outrageously wonderful as you can stand it. Get your juices going.
I would be really interested in hearing how this vision changes the way you see your current reality and what inspirations and opportunities appear. You are the creator of your life and you are here to be happy, to be a contribution and to discover your purpose and act in an easy and relaxed manner, in a healthy and positive way. Just writing this and thinking about you and your new life gives me the chills. Get a coach.
To your vision,
Coach Paradise
Editor's note: Coach Paradise (AKA Anne Nayer), Professional Life Coach, is a member of the International Coaching Federation, an MSW clinical social worker-psychotherapist and a medical case manager with 30 years experience working with people of all shapes, sizes and challenges.
For further information about her services, call 774-4355 or email her.
