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Charlotte Amalie
Sunday, December 4, 2022
HomeNewsArchivesCoach Paradise: Make it About More Than a New Year's Resolution

Coach Paradise: Make it About More Than a New Year's Resolution

Dear Coach Paradise,
I have already broken one of my resolutions and it’s only New Year’s Day. I resolved to exercise every day and to stop eating sweets. Starting today. Well … to make a long story short, I slept late and woke up feeling hung over and stuffed from too much eating and drinking. Not only did I not begin my day with the sun salutations I had promised myself, but also I ate leftover cheesecake for breakfast. This makes me think all these changes I want to see in my life are one big joke and I am, once again, a loser with no willpower. This doesn’t feel like a good way to begin the New Year, and I am in desperate need of help so I can turn things around before it's too late.
Signed,
Happy New Year wannabe
Dear Happy,
The fact that you wrote to me bodes extremely well for your success in the New Year. You realize that the whole New Year’s resolution thing is a setup and that there has to be some other approach to making your dreams come true in 2007. You are right!
The examples you gave have to do with being physically fit and healthy — eating better and getting in shape. This must be important to you, and I would like you to create a goal that would be possible to achieve if you got healthier and more fit. (Climbing Mt. Everest? Buying a whole new wardrobe? Going to your college reunion? Going surfing with your kids?) Something fun. It’s got to be fun and something that gets you all excited when you think about it. Start with the end in mind and everything else will fall into place — including exercising and eating better. The turnaround here is to resolve to go for what turns you on — to go for the gold, the juice. This is the only way that you will be able to hang in there to accomplish the less-appealing tasks such as losing weight, stopping smoking, going to the gym.
I would invite you to see change as a process and the promises you make as steps along the way to being the person you want to become. A great way to begin this is to look back at this past year and make a list everything that you accomplished, everything you feel good about and I mean everything (big or small). Then make a list of things that you would have liked to change, that were disappointments or challenges. Next you can list the areas of your life: health, relationship, finances, career, environment, spirituality and list what you would like to work on over this New Year. This should include specific goals (that feel good) in each area and some of the things that you are willing to do to move toward realizing those goals. Be specific.
A treasure map or dream board is a fun way to visualize where you are going. This is creating a collage that contains images and words that paint a picture of what you would like to see in your life — a picture of your goal. This is not only fun but also a powerful way to focus on what you want to create over this next year. You can post this where you see it on a regular basis and are reminded in a vivid way of where you are going.
Make resolutions for joy in 2007. Once you are in a feel-good place, you are automatically in the best position to take whatever steps you need to be, do and have whatever you want.
To your best year yet,
Coach Paradise
Editor's note: Coach Paradise (AKA Anne Nayer), Professional Life Coach, is a member of the International Coaching Federation, an MSW clinical social worker-psychotherapist and a medical case manager with 30 years experience working with people of all shapes, sizes and challenges.
For further information about her services, call 774-4355 or email her.

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